Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
