i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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