She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
