i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
