great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
