then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
