I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
