So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Randomize
