I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
