Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
