Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
