If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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