hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
