The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
