Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
My bed is full of blood and feathers
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
