i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
