i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
