Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
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