I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
