Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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