So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
