i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
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