I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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