I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Randomize
