..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
You're so nebulous sometimes
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize