tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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