I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
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