If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
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