yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
