She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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