i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Randomize
