Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
A+ Viking dick
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
