Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry uber_dweeb8285 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying

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(303): View more from Colorado

I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!

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(540): View more from Virginia

it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.

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(937): View more from Ohio

i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.

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(705): View more from Ontario

I love having hate sex.

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(609): View more from New Jersey

it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores

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(815): View more from Illinois

I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.

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(802): View more from Vermont

You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.

(1-802): View more from Vermont

A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.

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(713): View more from Texas

I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning

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