My nipple is on Facebook.
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
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