babies were throwing up all over the place
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
This is classic penis vs brain.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
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