it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
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