He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
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