so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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