having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
