im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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