I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
