Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Randomize