so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Randomize
