How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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