This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
