can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
