He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
