Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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