ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
