How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
