I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
